How to Photograph a Big Extended Family at the Beach
Most of my favorite sessions are the big ones. Sounds crazy I know but maybe it’s because I’m an only child and I just love to watch the interactions and family dynamics of a big family.
Everybody’s in town. There’s a rented house on the beach, more cars in the driveway than usual, cousins who only see each other once a year. Somebody’s turning eighty, or somebody flew in from four states away, and the whole thing only exists for about five days.
Those are the sessions where the photographs end up on walls. Those are the moments that are worth remembering.
They’re also the ones people are most nervous about booking, because twenty people sounds like chaos. It isn’t — but it does need about ten minutes of preparation, and most of that planning is mine, not yours.
Here’s how these actually work.
The one thing I need from you in advance
A list of the groupings you want.
That’s it. That’s the whole homework.
Before the session, sit down — ideally with the person whose idea this was — and write out every combination you’d like photographed. Everybody. Grandparents with all the grandchildren. Each family on its own. The four siblings. The kids only. Each couple.
Send it to me and I’ll build the order around it.
Why this matters so much: on the day, standing on a beach with the light going and everyone talking at once, nobody can think of the combinations. I’ve watched families get home and realize there’s no photograph of the three sisters together — not because anyone forgot to care, but because there was too much happening.
A list on my phone means we never lose one.
And nominate a wrangler
Pick one person — usually the aunt who organized the whole trip — whose job is to call out names.
I don’t know who’s who. I can’t shout “Uncle Mike’s family next” across a beach. But your wrangler can, and it will save us a few minutes and quite a lot of confusion. It’s the single most useful thing a big family can do for me.
Preferably someone who is not also in charge of a toddler.
The order I’ll put you in
There’s a right sequence for this, and it’s probably not the one you’re expecting. Most people assume we get the big group out of the way first. I do the opposite. I start small and build.
We begin with one family at a time. First, the whole family together, then just the parents, then just their kids. Then the next family, same three. All the way around.
There are two reasons for that, and the second one is the real one.
The first is that it eases everybody in. Twenty people standing in a line being told to smile is a cold start. Four people is a conversation.
The second is that it lets me learn your children. By the time we’ve been through each family, I know which kid is going to hold a pose and which one needs to be caught mid-air, who’s shy and who’s the performer, whose two-year-old has about nine good minutes left. That’s information I can’t get from a list, and it makes every grouping after that one better.
Then we build up. All the grandchildren together. Then the grandparents added to the grandchildren. Then all the parents added in, and now — without anyone quite noticing how we got here we have the big group photograph, with everyone already warmed up and laughing instead of braced.
Then we do the whole thing again
That first pass happens with the dunes behind you.
Once it’s done, the sun has dropped far enough that we can turn around and put the ocean behind you instead and we work back through the groupings a second time.
The second pass is the fun one. By now everybody knows what they’re doing and nobody’s nervous, so this is where I ask for the running, the kids charging at their parents, the things that don’t work when people are still self-conscious.
It’s also where the extra combinations happen — the adult children with their parents, just the grandparents on their own, whatever else your list has on it.
We end with everybody together at the water’s edge, and I’ll time it so a wave comes over your feet. You may get wet…possibly soaked!
And then, if everyone is still in a good mood, we stop directing entirely and just let the family play in the shallows while I photograph it.
Those last few minutes are consistently my favorite frames of the whole session.
How long it takes
Longer than a single-family session, because we work through the groupings twice and there are simply more people which means more combinations. I budget a healthy hour for a really large group.
What eats the clock in a big group is the deciding. Working out who’s next. Finding the person who went back to the car. Waiting while somebody finishes a phone call. Every one of those is solved in advance by the list and the wrangler.
Getting everyone there
This is where big groups might actually go wrong, and it has nothing to do with photography.
Pick one meeting point and be specific. Not “the beach.” A named beach access, and where in the parking lot. Send it in one message, to everyone, with the time and a pin. I will let you know what time to be there. Please try not to be late.
Think about parking. Twenty people is six or seven cars. Some accesses on this coast are free with plenty of room, some are metered and fill up by five. Tell me where you’re staying and I’ll tell you which access to use.
Think about who can’t do stairs. Some beach accesses have a ramp; others have a flight of steps down to the sand. If Grandma is coming and she is, that’s the point this is the detail that decides where we meet. I know which accesses have ramps, and I’d much rather choose the right one than watch someone struggle.
The children
I have three rules and they’ve never failed me.
Stay flexible. If a two-year-old is not doing it, we move on and come back. Forcing a child into a photograph produces a photograph of a child being forced. I’m also a mom and totally get it. Listen.. we have all been there. I’m patient.
Make it fun. No stress. Most of what I do with small children isn’t posing, it’s a game. Running at me, running at Grandpa, being swung between two parents. The photographs that come out of that are the ones you’ll actually love.
Bring bribes! Now is not the time for perfect parenting and I am certainly not judging! I’m completely serious. Lollipops, fruit snacks, whatever works in your house.
Why the first pass faces the dunes
Here’s the bit that surprises every family.
For that first pass through the groupings, I’ll have you facing the ocean rather than the dunes. That means the dunes are behind you.
I know — you pictured the ocean behind you. You’ll get that, I promise. But we’re on the east coast of Florida, which means the water is to the east and the sun is setting behind you. Early in the session, while the sun is still fairly high, facing the camera with the ocean as your backdrop gives you a beautifully lit ocean and a row of squinting silhouettes.
Facing the dunes puts the light where it belongs: on your faces. Behind you are sea oats and sand and sky, which looks like Florida and looks like nowhere else.
Then we wait for the sun to drop, turn everyone around, and do it again with the water behind you — by which point the light is soft enough that it works beautifully.
That’s why we shoot everything twice. It isn’t indecision. It’s the only way to get both.
Where we can do this
The beach is where most of these happen, and there are good public accesses up and down this coast.
But I’ll also come to you. If your family has rented a beach house for the week, we can photograph right there on the deck, in the yard, down the walkway. This means nobody has to convince anyone to get in a car.
And it doesn’t have to be sand at all. Parks, green spaces and the local trails photograph beautifully, and if your family includes someone for whom walking on soft sand is difficult, that’s often the kinder choice.
What it costs
Family sessions start at $450, and larger extended-family groups are a little more depending on how many of you there are.
That includes all of your edited images in both color and black and white, an online gallery, and a print release. You’ll have them back within two to three weeks.
Tell me roughly how many people and I’ll send you an exact number.
If your family is all going to be in one place for a reunion, a holiday, a big birthday, or just a week at the beach then that’s exactly the moment worth photographing! Those weeks don’t come around often.
Tell me when everyone’s in town and roughly how many of you there are, and I’ll take care of the rest.
[See how a family session works →]
